Purveyors of the Finest Fettucine Tiaras

I have returned from Asia.

It has been a whole month since I last wrote (or even looked at) this Blog which feels quite weird. We are slowly getting reacquainted: she (this blog) is a bit miffed about the neglect and has remained unimpressed by my travellers tales. She also thinks I have got fatter. I will have to work extra hard to get back in favour.

On my return I was surprised to discover that certain people have been encouraging other certain people to scrawl poetic graffiti all over this Blog. Part of me was delighted by your offerings while another part (the more literary and culturally sensitive part) cringed at the lack of scansion and slightly dubious rhymes. I somehow think that, when the time comes, a new poet laureate will not be selected from among the ranks of garden bloggers. And stop encouraging Selina, she is supposed to be working (she has also just found my private stash of chocolate digestives)..

Fortunately I am in a very forgiving mood as I am much refreshed, slightly tanned, overly excitable, mildly jet-lagged (at least I was), sad that it is all over and yet pleased to be back. All in all the healthy signs of a thoroughly delightful time. I could go on for ages telling you about the trip but very soon you would all glaze over and wander off in search of sandwiches so I will be brief.

I have visited four countries – China (well, Hong Kong), Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos.

I have travelled on nine aeroplanes, three trains (including one sleeper shared with some Germans), two buses, one jeep, a lot of Tuk-Tuks (not all of whose drivers knew where they were going), three ferries, two canoes, approximately fourteen taxis (two of which tried to overcharge me), one tram and two bicycles.

I have seen temples, mountains, rivers, museums, forests, waterfalls (impressive in the monsoon, alas this is the dry season), lasers in Hong Kong Harbour, bears (both Sun and Moon), history, markets, turtles, statues, iguanas,  elephants, forests burning, coffee plantations, some very adventurous lavatories, the filming of a Vietnamese gangster film, some men with very hairy moles, an exceptionally gorgeous airline stewardess, mines (exploding not open cast), butterflies, prisons, palm trees and a lot of noodles.

I have stayed in a number of hotels ranging from the very basic to the deeply luxurious.

I have had men waiting in the arrivals halls at Saigon, Hanoi and Heathrow airports carrying signs with my name mispelt in thick marker pen. This has fulfilled a major life ambition of mine.

I have failed to see the sun rise over Angkor Wat (it rained) or set over the Mekong River (we missed it). I have been very hot and very wet.

I have eaten rather a lot. Although I refused the skinned cat and sauteed rodent.

So, back to normal life, I suppose. Clients, gardens and all that kerfuffle.

The picture is of a very lovely  blue water lily. I am listening to Angie by the Rolling Stones.

PS I am thrilled to have received this comment on my Crocus Blog; “Very much liked your writing style and would be interested to have a follow up! http://www.ladyboysheaven.com” I have referred them on to Mr Diacono who has a soft spot for that sort of thing. Did I tell you about my Crocus Blog? It is new and shiny and in depth and full of fascinating stuff about things. Sally Nex is snuggled up next door to me which is very warming.