He soon discovered that sea urchins make poor paperweights

I have discovered an interesting website at petitions.pm.gov.uk which is where you can register petitions to the government. Others my then log on and sign your petition after which, presumably, the government will completely ignore you having spent a fair bit of taxpayers money on setting up and administering the website. I think it is called mollification of the public – along the same lines of Emperors treating the citizenry to circuses and entertainment in order to detract from more important issues.

There is a simple petition inviting the Prime Minister to resign (83 signees) and another to legalise Cannabis (92 signees) but my favourites are the petition to keep HP Sauce in Britain (5 signees) and in particular the one campaigning to replace the National Anthem with “Gold” by Spandau Ballet (3 signees).

The most popular petition is 1842 for the repeal of the Hunting Act and among the least popular is one to introduce natural body building for the 2014 Commonwealth Games (0 signees). One would of thought that anybody submitting a petition should have at least one friend.

Lots of very large bits of topiary (yews, box balls and Hornbeam columns) were delivered to one of my favourite jobs today so I spent a happy afternoon jiggling them around the site prior to planting. Behold an instant courtyard with structure and gravitas. There is however, a curious anticlimax to any planting job. I call it the Schlump.

When the setting out of plants is complete you stand back and it all looks wonderful: crowds of pots spread out before you as far as the eye can see (or at least as far as the end of the border). The digging and planting then commences and all the illusion of height (given because of the lift provided by the pots) is lost and all there is is an expanse of soil and only slight bumps where the plants lie. Today a Yew that was originally giving me a crick in the neck was suddenly reduced to my eye level and seemed less imposing.An oddly unsatisfying feeling but fortunately one that does not last very long.

I am listening to Addicted by Amy Winehouse and the picture is of a hot air balloon above a traffic jam on the A34 by Winchester. No reason.